


I've got you.

by darksquall



Series: It's Nothing [2]
Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Alcohol, F/M, Hangover, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Nightmares, Past Abuse, Past Mind Control, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Relationship(s), Sexuality Crisis, Sorceresses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:08:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21893413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darksquall/pseuds/darksquall
Summary: Seifer wakes up in a strange bed. He had a nightmare, hehasa hangover and he's not sure if Squall will let him live the night.Sequal to It's nothing. #10 - "I've got you."Seifer is back at Balamb after the war, dealing with the fallout of Things What Have Happened and this time around, he made SeeD. Then the boys got a lot closer. Implied past noncon, implied past mind control, knight-sorceress shit. Also some sexuality figuring out.
Relationships: Rinoa Heartilly/Squall Leonhart, Seifer Almasy/Squall Leonhart, Seifer Almasy/Ultimecia
Series: It's Nothing [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1577059
Comments: 14
Kudos: 69





	I've got you.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RaceUlfson](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaceUlfson/gifts).



“It’s okay,” the voice said softly. “I’ve got you.”

Seifer couldn’t stifle a whimper. He clutched at the warm body beside him tightly, forcing his eyes open with a gasp.

Then he gasped again. The last person he’d expected to see there was Squall Leonhart, all pale skin and dark hair in the moonlight. “S...Squall?”

“You were having a bad dream, but it’s okay, I’ve got you.”

Seifer glanced around the room. It wasn’t his room. He presumed it was Squall’s bedroom in the Commander’s suite from the little evidences here and there. He spotted more now he was starting to look for them - A gunblade case with a familiar lion lurked in one corner, the moonlight catching the bright chrome edges and flair on the front of the ebony case. Pictures adorned one wall, from the closing days of the war and the celebrations after. One picture even showed the once happy couple, Squall and Rinoa hugging each other and smiling for the camera. Squall had a double bed, a large, comfortable double bed and they were tangled up in the sheets in the darkness.

Squall reached over to the bedside table to pick up a bottle of water. He was sat up a little in bed, back against the pillows. Seifer was halfway down the bed and had both arms wrapped around Squall’s waist tightly and he wasn’t sure whether he ought to have let go already. With his heart pounding in his chest the way it was, he wasn’t sure he even _could_ let go. “Here, sip some water,” Squall said, twisting off the cap and holding it up for him. 

Seifer slowly coaxed one of his arms from around Squall and took the bottle carefully. He was shaking violently and he couldn’t help it. The dreams had really fucked with his head this time, he’d seen himself torture Squall again, kill him, and still somehow manage to fail his sorceress. He could still feel the blood on his hands.

He had a headache. The steady pounding of a very angry drum was far too loud in the back of his head now he’d noticed it. Squall’s hand folded over his, steadying him carefully long enough to take a slow drink from the bottle. “I’m in your bed,” he murmured, as soon as he could find his voice. “...right?”

“Mmhm,” Squall answered. His voice was soft and soothing, coaxing him back to sleep gently. Like a real lover would. “It’s okay, Seifer. Go back to sleep.”

Something was very weird. He did not make a habit of waking up in strange beds and not remembering how he’d gotten into them. And as much as he’d tried to flirt with Squall over the previous weeks, he was not in the position yet to just randomly wake up in what was genuinely a very strange bed. “Wait, _why_ am I in your bed?”

“You were very drunk, and you wanted to fuck me.”

Seifer stared at Squall, hoping vainly that it would all be an extremely unfunny joke or attempt at sarcasm. Squall’s expression did not change, however and Seifer let his head sink back down with a groan. “Oh Hyne,” he breathed, and realised belatedly that his new position let his forehead rest on Squall’s abs. As long as he stayed very, very still, his head would not explode and Squall _might_ take pity on him and not take his foolish head off. 

Then again, if Squall removed his head, at least it wouldn’t hurt so much any more. 

Probably.

“You were pretty determined,” Squall sounded almost bemused, which at least boded well for him keeping his head. Vague details came back to him about the evening’s escapades. It had been his birthday and the last day before the Yule break. A few SeeDs, as well as Squall and his little entourage had decided to go out for dinner and drinks in Balamb. Of course, because it was his birthday there had been a lot of drinks turning up at his table and it would have been rude to turn them down.

“Please don’t make it worse,” he pleaded softly. He just hoped he’d not been too ridiculous about wanting to fuck Squall. At least in front of the other SeeDs.

“It’s okay, I convinced you to wait til morning. You were far too drunk to consent anyway.”

“I’m sorry,” Seifer said, willing the floor to open up, swallow the half of the bed he was mostly on and thereby save him all further embarrassment forever. Sure he’d have to live in a cave… probably with the Shumi too, but quite frankly to avoid Squall and the embarrassment that he would definitely be feeling every time that he even looked at Squall again, it’d totally be worth it. “Just…, Sorry. About everything.”

“It’s okay, Seifer. Here…,” Squall cast Esuna, removing some of the after effects of the alcohol. It eased his headache somewhat, enough to make thinking a little less painful. And speed it up a little. “You going to be okay if I turn the light on?”

“I think so,” Seifer said, even though he really didn’t think so. He was desperately trying to remember what he’d said and when he’d said it, but the evening was an almost entirely blank slate. Squall tapped the lamp on his bedside table just once, enough to bring a soft warm light to the room. A clock on the bedside table displayed a time somewhere around four thirty a.m and Seifer swore it was deliberately ticking at him. “Can I have some more water?” 

Squall uncapped the bottle again and offered it to him. “I didn’t know you had nightmares.”

“Left over from Ulti,” he admitted grudgingly. Since the war, he’d had a lot of them, left overs from the knight link and the broken mind he’d been tied to for so long. Whether by design or by accident, she had ensured he would suffer for his failure and most nights he woke at least once with her name on his lips or her voice ringing in his ears. “Freaky fucked up bitch left me a lot of presents like that, for failing her, I guess.”

“I’m sorry,” Squall said, and Seifer genuinely believed him. At least Squall kind of knew where he was coming from, though his sorceress was still alive. His nightmare had been the one he’d lived with through the war. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Lobotomy, maybe?” Seifer joked, finishing the bottle of water. Squall took it back from him with a chuckle and set it back on the bedside table. 

“Think Lionheart would take a little more than either of us are comfortable with you losing,” Squall stroked Seifer’s hair with cool fingers. It was such an oddly intimate little gesture, so gentle and careful. Seifer liked it. Then he felt weird for liking it and started second guessing himself - was he supposed to like it? Was Squall really attracted to him? Was he supposed to do something in return?

“Guess so,” he pillowed his cheek against Squall’s abs again - holding his head up was just making the room spin and hell, he might as well enjoy his last moments of having a head on his shoulders. Unless… “Squall? Can I ask you something?”

“Mmm?”

“Considering that I am in your bed and you did _not_ take my head off even when I was apparently begging you for sex, does that mean you _are_ interested in me?”

“No Seifer, I kiss all my graduating students,” Squall replied, deadpan. His hand didn't stop moving, stroking Seifer’s hair still slowly, still carefully, little by little getting further back every time until he reached the sensitive skin at the back of Seifer’s neck. Seifer shivered and curled as close to Squall as he could just to make it easier for Squall to keep it up.

“I don’t have the energy for sarcasm right now, please.”

“It was that or a blond joke,” Squall shrugged, entirely too cheerfully for the middle of the night. 

“I’m the one with a headache here, I have no problem with smacking you in the head if I need to,” Seifer grumbled, tipping his head just enough to be able to look up at Squall without having to lift his head. 

Squall gave him a look that said simply ‘try it’. 

“So… are you gay? You said you weren’t interested in women, right?”

“I’m gay.”

“You don’t _act_ gay though.” 

“That is the stupidest thing I’ve heard you say,” Squall gave Seifer’s hair a sharp tug. Enough to make him wince and pull away again, afraid of further reprisals. Instead, he sat up, noting that not only was Squall not naked, he wasn’t either. Both of them were still wearing their underwear. Seifer wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or disappointed. Either way, he stayed close enough to be able to feel Squall, close enough for Squall’s hand to rest against the small of his back lightly. He liked it when Squall touched him. “And, remember, _I_ heard you call someone a chicken wuss.”

“But.. you don’t.”

“I’ve been pretty sure of my sexuality for the last four or five years - I’ll give you that while I was being controlled by my sorceress I was ‘acting’ straight but please, keep digging yourself deeper and tell me what you mean by acting gay.”

Seifer considered what he really meant. Oh hyne, Squall was right. He was buying into stupid stereotypes and expecting some cliche camp and effeminate man just because they happened to be gay. Although he wasn’t going to ask about the leathers. At least not while Squall was close enough to hit him. “.....You’re right, I’m being an asshole.”

“Thank you for finally admitting it. Before I had to get the whiskey back out.”

“....I… I don’t think I’m gay.”

“I’m getting the whiskey back out,” Squall said, starting to pull away from him. 

Seifer caught his arm and pulled him close again. “Wait, no… I, Squall you’re the only one who can help me make sense of this shit.”

Squall gave a very, very long suffering sigh, dragging a hand through his hair. He was all dark eyes and messy brown hair, but he always had been. Seifer had seen far too many shadows under those pretty grey eyes for anyone to deal with alone. “Okay fine. Do you like having sex with, or want to have sex with women?”

“Yeah…” Seifer nodded. He liked having sex with women. He hadn’t had sex with a lot but any time he’d had the opportunity it had seemed perfectly fine. 

“Right. Do you also want to want to have sex with me when you’re not drunk off your face?”

What he wanted to do, in his heart of hearts, was a hell of a lot more than just sex. Seifer was pretty sure there would be ice cream involved. Or at least whipped cream. Maybe some chocolate sauce. Also wedding bells at some point or other. He thought it best not to expand upon those thoughts while Squall was still close enough to reach him and make him regret all of them. “Yes.”

“Then you’re bi, or pan” Squall waved a hand dismissively. “Or something similar.”

“You can be that?” Seifer took one look at Squall’s rapidly darkening expression and held up a hand in surrender. “Okay okay, you can be that. I can be that. But you’re not.”

“No, I’m glad we’ve established this. Yet again. Can I get up and make us some coffee while you have an existential crisis about your sexuality, or is this something we must face while hungover and tired?”

Seifer blushed intensely and let Squall go. “Fine, make some damn coffee.”

“Thank you,” Squall breathed a sigh of relief, easing himself away from Seifer gently. As soon as his feet were over the edge of the bed and he was sitting upright, Squall gave him another critical look and rolled his eyes. “Hyne,” he muttered, leaning back just long enough to kiss Seifer. It was another slow, lingering, hungry little kiss and parts of Seifer woke up a hell of a lot faster than the rest of him. “Seifer, it’s okay. Gay, straight, bi, other... You’ll be okay.”

Seifer watched Squall’s retreating form, all pale skin and very thin black boxers. He had an ass like a cupcake and Seifer had known that for a very, _very_ long time. At least since Squall had turned fifteen and all the awkwardness of being a teenager had passed him by in the blink of an eye leaving in its wake a very beautiful young man with a soft voice and pouting lips, and an ass that had every member of garden turning their head to look. Now he was just really beginning to appreciate what he wanted to _do_ to the cupcake and feeling a hell of a lot like a pervert. 

Seifer clambered out of bed after him, ignoring the way the room twisted and swam, and followed him into the kitchenette and small lounge he had. It was one of the very few perks to being the commander slash headmaster. He was leaning against the counter in front of the coffee pot, rubbing his eyes. “I’m sorry about all this.”

“It’s okay,” Squall gave him a small smile when he looked up again. “I kind of did this to someone else before, so I figure fate’s making me pay for it.”

That smile. He could probably count the times he’d seen that smile on one hand. Maybe both hands, and that was since he’d come back from being a general dumbass and trying to take over the world for crazy hat wearing strange women from the future. “Should I ask or just wallow in jealousy?”

“Irvine. It was how I first managed to get out from Rin’s control after the war… Stayed up drinking one night, and got to talking about sexuality… I finally managed to get someone to believe me about what was going on even though I couldn’t talk about it much. We were talking until it got light and he helped me convince her that she was making a mistake.”

“So I owe him.”

“Just… pay it forward if you ever get the chance,” Squall shrugged. “You’re more than likely to be a mentor - we have a few wannabe young bladers looking to make SeeD in a few years.”

“Ahh, so you think the gunblades are something to do with the sexuality thing?” he joked. 

“No, I think Garden’s a good way to offload kids you’re wrongly ashamed of so we have a far higher LGBT percentage than a regular school.”

Seifer stared at him open mouthed for a moment. He hadn’t been expecting an answer to his smart assed comment, and he certainly hadn’t been expecting _that_. “...Fuck… I didn’t… Sorry, I apparently am set to asshole permanently.” 

“Come here,” Squall held his hands out to Seifer. Seifer forced himself closer, taking one of Squall’s offered hands. Squall was still a little shorter, the difference between them a little more pronounced than it had been in the war, but he was all legs and tight muscles. Not overtly muscular but he looked like he was made for dancing. He was, really, just with a gunblade as his partner. “Let me see if I can find the switch to change that setting.”

Squall coaxed him into a kiss. His kisses were still electric, neon bright kisses that made Seifer’s toes curl on the bare tile of the kitchen floor. He became acutely aware of all the points in which he and Squall were touching - their lips, the hand tangled with his, the other hand that cupped the back of his neck. It felt as though a bolt of lightning arced through all of them. “You know you’re just encouraging me to remain an asshole so you’ll keep looking for the switch,” he murmured when Squall finally let him take a breath.

“I think I already found it,” Squall smirked right back at him, and deliberately pressed against him. Yes, certain parts of him were very awake and only getting more awake with those kisses. He was as hard as glass and he didn’t know whether that had happened in the bedroom or at that amazing kiss. 

_“Hyne…”_

Squall very deliberately, though gently, pushed him back just far enough to have room to turn, focusing on pouring coffee and adding sugar. It took every ounce of self control that Seifer had not to press up against him and feel that perfect cupcake ass against his crotch. “Not him, just a knight.”

“Would you have preferred ‘oh fuck’?”

“Sounds much more like an invitation,” Squall offered him a mug. “Come back to bed with me, Seifer.”

He took the mug carefully and tangled the fingers of his free hand with Squall’s, palm to palm. He’d held hands with women before, but not a man. Certainly not a man with such cool, long and familiar fingers. He remembered every callus, every mark from Squall’s gunblade even despite the gloves he wore. Seifer knew them from similar marks on his own hands. “I’ll try to have a quieter existential crisis.” 

“Good, but since we don’t have to be anywhere tomorrow,” Squall led him carefully back to the bed. Squall’s large, and pretty nice bed, that he had been sleeping in with Squall before he’d woken up from a nightmare to find the most beautiful dream waiting for him. “You can carry on a little while.”

Seifer sat on the edge of the bed even as Squall crawled back onto it. Not a drop spilled from the mug as Squall settled back happily into the nest of blankets and covers on the bed, sipping his drink thoughtfully. Seifer couldn’t take his eyes off Squall - he felt like everything he did was so effortlessly graceful and perfect. It made him feel like a buffoon beside him sometimes. “You do things to me I don’t have words for.”

“By all means try to find some, could be funny.”

“Only if laughter turns you on.”

“It might,” Squall shrugged and sipped at his coffee thoughtfully. “No one’s ever tried that on me.”

“Okay, next time I’ll bring a joke book to bed.”

“Next time?” Squall echoed, one eyebrow arched quizzically. He was hiding a smile behind his mug however, Seifer wasn’t beyond noticing that. 

“Provided I get an invite back.”

“We’ll review tomorrow. Or later today, it's getting pretty late.”

“Would you let me kiss you again?”

“Seifer,” Squall said with the greatest patience that Seifer had ever heard from him. “You can do anything you want to until I tell you to stop.”

Seifer took a deliberately large swallow from his drink and set his mug down on the bedside table. He was far more with it than he had been all night as far as he could remember between the coffee and the Esuna Squall had cast before. He had free reign, and he was not about to waste it. Seifer kissed Squall at the corner of his mouth. He trailed his lips along the line of Squall’s chin - Squall had the smoothest skin, Seifer wasn’t even sure he even needed to shave yet. 

He listened to the way the tone of Squall’s little rumbles and moans changed as he littered little kisses along Squall’s skin. His throat, just above his collarbone on the left side was particularly sensitive, especially when Seifer couldn’t hold himself back any longer. He bit the skin, and Squall gave the huskiest, neediest little fuck me moan that Seifer had ever had the pleasure of hearing.

It was perfection. Seifer left a mark there and slipped lower, ghosting his hand over the front of Squall’s underwear. Of course, he’d touched himself before, he’d jerked off enough times - he was only human after all but touching Squall was different, it was… amazing. The hard arc of Squall’s cock impressively tenting his underwear, the feel of the warmth of Squall’s hardness through the thin layer of cotton. If Squall kept sounding like _that_ and kept feeling the way he did, Seifer was going to be entirely addicted to him before the night was out. 

He was absolutely okay with that. Especially with the way Squall rocked up against his hand eagerly for more. Squall’s pale skin seemed to flush all over after his kisses - partly his actions and probably a little bit to do with his five o'clock shadow, Seifer guessed. He should have shaved before starting, but Squall was doing anything but complain as Seifer grazed his teeth over one of his nipples. “Nn, fuck…” he hissed, and tangled his fingers in Seifer’s hair.

“Feel free to give me any directions you think are necessary,” Seifer murmured against Squall’s skin teasingly. He was careful to avoid the old scar from the icicle for now though, just skirting the edge with sweet little kisses, acknowledgement but not indulgence. He wasn’t quite sure how Squall felt about it. Obviously it wasn’t enough of a problem to have him covering up when Seifer was around, but occasionally Seifer had seen him scratch at it, or wince with a hand over it. He wasn’t sure if it still hurt at all. 

Still he ventured further south, little ghosts of scars from training and the war here and there getting much more intimate treatment, the sweep of a tongue, the slightest little worry of teeth, and Seifer finally managed to press a kiss just above the line of Squall’s boxers and coax the fabric out of the way.

“Seifer?” Squall said, his voice as breathless as Seifer had ever heard it. “Do you want to fuck me?”

He looked up at Squall, wrapping his hand lightly around the arc of Squall’s cock and stroking him very slowly. “Will I hurt you?” he asked, genuinely unsure. He’d hurt Squall enough for one lifetime, he didn’t want to run the risk of doing it again. 

“Not if you listen to me.”

“Show me.”

Squall leant over to the bedside table, pulling out a bottle of lube. It was cool, and smelt faintly of strawberries - Seifer couldn’t even bring himself to tease his lover about it. Instead he let Squall guide his hand and watched almost enraptured. “You need to get me ready, so I can take you, understand?” 

“I got it,” Seifer nodded, rubbing the first fingertip where Squall showed him. And with just a little pressure it sank into Squall’s opening slowly. He heard Squall’s breath catch and shifted lower, nipping at the sensitive flesh on the inside of Squall’s thighs as he prepared him slowly, letting Squall be his guide when he was ready to take more. He swore Squall’s body grew hotter around his fingers - and he rocked his hips for more eagerly every time Seifer even thought about stopping.

So he gave him more, and _more_ , listening hungrily to every breathless little cry of pleasure as though he’d never hear it again. He had never been so hard in his entire life - and he’d never cared less about being hard either. He just wanted to make Squall feel as good as humanly possible.

“Seifer,” Squall growled at last and grabbed for Seifer’s wrist. 

“Fuck, did I hurt you?” 

“No,” Squall was blushing intensely, his teeth worrying at his lower lip. “But if you keep doing that, you’re going to make me come….”

“I...am very okay with that.” 

“I’m not above begging for your cock.”

“....If I wanted to hear that,” Seifer cleared his throat. “Ah… what would that sound like?”

Squall pulled him closer, making him move all the way back up to be in reach to kiss Squall again. “Please… please, Seifer… Give it to me,” Squall gave a breathless little moan of pleasure right against Seifer’s ear, his voice dropping to the huskiest whisper Seifer had ever heard. “I want you inside me, fuck me… I need you.”

And then Squall _rolled_ his hips up, letting the hard length of his cock slide against Seifer’s with just the thin fabric of Seifer’s boxers between them. 

Seifer was genuinely surprised he didn’t come right there. He coaxed his fingers out of Squall gently, and kissed his shoulder again. “Sh… Show me how it’ll feel best for you.”

Squall helped. Squall pushed his underwear out of the way, stroking him with the lube and then guided him into position. Seifer was surprised at how similar to not-gay sex it all was, missionary and all. Squall wrapped his legs around Seifer, hooking them at the ankles and Seifer’s cock slid into Squall so perfectly he was sure that was another sign that they were supposed to be together. Squall was so hot and tight and perfect around him that he just held still for a moment, gathering all the little tells that it wasn’t a dream. 

There was something amazing about the way it felt to have Squall’s arms and Squall’s legs all wrapped around him, while he was pressed so deep into Squall that he couldn’t go any further. As though he were surrounded by Squall, completely engulfed by him and he had never felt so… safe. As though somehow, Squall would make it all okay again. He’d always done that though, Seifer mused. For everyone. For the whole world.

That was why he deserved better.

“Seifer,” Squall’s voice was an urgent whisper at his ear, and his blunt fingernails dug lightly into Seifer’s back. “Please, _please_ … Fuck me, Seifer…”

He moved. The first thrust pulled a desperate little cry of pleasure from Squall’s throat, then a purr of satisfaction and Seifer swore then and there that he would do anything to make Squall do that again. And again. And _again_. 

He kept moving, a little roll to his hips as he thrust into Squall’s body over and over as he fucked him. Every little change in angle seemed to drive Squall closer to the edge, He kissed Squall over and over, hungry for every little bit of intimacy and contact he could get, revelling in the feeling of Squall clutching at him and clinging to him so desperately, so hungrily. The way that Squall touched and kissed and begged was incredible.

Then Squall came. Every nerve ending in Seifer’s body was alive and he wanted that moment to last forever, with his name so desperately falling from Squall’s lips. He kept moving, kept fucking Squall for what seemed like hours and seconds at the same time. He didn’t want it to end, but it had to. 

He came, clinging to Squall as tight as he could, breathlessly desperate, beyond even managing Squall’s name for a moment.

He slumped down over Squall, unable to hold himself up a moment longer. 

Seifer was distantly disappointed when the legs unhooked from around his waist and moved just enough to let Squall be more comfortable. The arms stayed though, tight and comforting, but one did shift just enough to let Squall tangle his fingers in Seifer’s short blond hair. “Seifer?”

“Mm?” he hummed, tipping his head just enough to be able to kiss Squall softly. “Yeah?”

“How’s the existential sexuality crisis?”

“Crisis averted.”

Squall gave him a little smile, and ruffled his hair gently. Seifer swore then and there that he would do anything, _anything_ to see that smile every day of his life. Even if he had to face down Rinoa herself. In the froofiest hat of them all. “Good.”

Eventually Seifer had to move, just long enough to handle the usual clean up, and Squall shifted, rubbing his hip absently. “You okay?”

“Very okay,” Squall nodded and offered him an arm. “Tired though. You are staying, right?”

Seifer nodded dumbly, curling against Squall and dragging the covers over both of them. He settled against Squall’s side, letting Squall wrap that arm around him, resting his head on Squall’s shoulder and half sprawling over him possessively. Squall was warm, and familiar, beautiful and above all he was _right_. Seifer almost felt like Squall was the missing piece he’d been looking for all of his life. And he knew if he admitted it, he’d break it all into more pieces than he’d ever be able to find again. 

Squall turned the light out again, and melted against him. “Goodnight, Seifer.”

“Squall…” 

“Seifer, if your switch is still on,” Squall said, his voice a sharp edge of warning. “I _will_ kick you out of this bed.”

“I’ll save it until in the morning.”

“That would be wise,” Squall’s expression softened from what little Seifer could see in the semi darkness, only the moonlight and the stars and the odd still blinking light of Garden to guide them, and he kissed Seifer again. “Get some rest, dumbass, we can talk more tomorrow.”

“Later today.”

“Seifer,” Squall half growled in warning.

Seifer closed his eyes and held onto Squall that little bit tighter. “I’m asleep, I promise.”

“Let me up,” Squall’s voice seemed oddly close. 

Seifer creaked an eye open and yawned. For a moment he was totally lost, and then he remembered. Drunkenly accosting Squall. Apparently begging him for sex. Having a mild freak out about something or other. Then actually having sex. He’d fucked Squall Leonhart, and Squall had begged him to do it. “Oh hyne.”

“Still not him. Move your ass,” Squall ordered, slapping the offending body part lightly. “I need coffee and food.”

“You never eat breakfast.”

“Patently false. I eat breakfast when _I_ can cook it, or when I got laid the night before.” 

“I’ll keep an eye out for that so I know when to be jealous,” Seifer shifted just enough to slump onto the cool sheets beside Squall instead of being half sprawled over him and grumbled. Squall dragged the covers back over him and left the bed to disappear through the bedroom door still totally bare assed naked. Seifer had to admit, the view was astoundingly beautiful. Especially the few bite marks and faint bruises from where he’d taken time to explore Squall. “Wait, you cook?” 

“Not much,” Squall’s voice came back distantly. “Just basics.”

“Are you turning into a morning person? Did Selphie finally bite you?”

“Seifer, it’s nearly ten and the cafeteria will be closed by the time we get there. If anything I am a hungry person. And anyway, the only person who bit me last night was you.”

Seifer smiled to himself. Oh he remembered that. He remembered the desperately needy little noises Squall had made when he’d done it too. Especially that spot right above his collarbone - he was going to have to explore that again and maybe buy Squall a turtleneck sweater for yule. Perhaps even several. “If you ask me nice, I might do it again.”

“How do you like your bacon?”

“That is a very nice way of asking, I bow to your superior talent.”

“Seifer…”

“Cooked enough so I could use it as a weapon, or shatter it,” Seifer dragged himself up out of bed and peered into the kitchen area. Squall glanced over - he must have caught the movement out of the corner of his eye - and gave Seifer a quick smile. His kitchen, though small, had a few little areas for food prep. Gas burners, an oven and a microwave. Also, the all important coffee pot. Before the previous night he’d never even been in Squall’s quarters, no need when he could be given orders over the desk in the Commander’s office instead. It wasn’t much of a perk - not nearly enough to make up for the job, anyway - but it would do. 

“Something else we have in common,” Squall said, looking a little surprised. He added the bacon to the hot pan, and turned to pour the coffee. It was all so very normal and domestic but the midmorning light was that pale gold of midwinter and it caught all the reddest tones in Squall’s hair and made him look like a million gil. Seifer was pretty sure it was the first time in a long time he’d seen Squall without the shadows under his eyes. 

“Hyne, you’re beautiful.”

Squall glanced over at him again, and Seifer caught the amused smirk. “You said that out loud.”

“Yeah? Been trying to for a few years I guess.”

That finally made the blush fill Squall’s cheeks and he bit his lip. Squall was not a man who got a lot of compliments - and that was the biggest pity. Almost everyone at garden had had a crush on him at some point or another and none of them had ever even thought to tell him how gorgeous he was? Seifer made a mental note to do it more often. As often as humanly possible until Squall stopped blushing like that and knew he was gorgeous. “Sex knocks screws loose in Seifer’s head, good to know.”

“That’s what sex is, isn’t it? A screw?” 

Squall chuckled and shook his head. “Such a difference to last night.”

“I don’t do so hot at night right now. I think if I kept spending the nights with you though, I could handle it a lot better.”

“My turn to have the asshole switch engaged,” Squall fetched plates and condiments but paused long enough to give him a brief smile. “Sorry.” 

“No, after the shit I said last night, I was due for it,” Seifer shrugged, strolling up to the counter that separated the kitchen work area and the rest of the small lounge. He leant against it, watching Squall intently. The little domestic ballet of making breakfast was oddly fascinating, and not just because Squall was doing it totally bare assed naked. “And I’m serious, I want to keep doing this.”

“You remember I’m leaving in a few weeks, right?”

“Does that mean we can’t both be happy until then?”

“It’ll make it harder to leave.”

“That’s what I’m counting on. Or you snapping and taking me with you.”

Squall rolled his eyes and offered Seifer a small plate with a sandwich, and a mug. “Breakfast, Almasy. Let’s eat on the couch so you don’t get crumbs in _our_ bed.”

“Is that a yes?”

“It’s a get your ass on the couch before I kick you there,” Squall said, pushing the items into his hands and turning to get his own breakfast. “Asshat.”

“I like you too.”

That made Squall blush even more. Seifer was getting to like that blush a lot - When he’d gotten Squall used to being told he was beautiful he’d have to find other ways of making him blush. “I like you, Seifer, or you wouldn’t have made it to my bed.” 

“It’s nice to hear it though.”

“Yeah… it is…” 

They ate in silence, Seifer realised just how hungry he was as soon as he took the first bite. He ate ravenously, any lingering headache being shushed by bacon and carbs and coffee, but the room was still kind of cool and he couldn’t help shivering. Squall got up halfway through finishing their makeshift breakfast to fetch a blanket from the bedroom, settling next to Seifer and sharing it. “Sorry, should have realised you’d find it cool in here.”

“Damn, I was hoping you’d find a more fun way of warming me up.”

“Food first,” Squall said, pointedly picking up his sandwich. “Or we won’t have enough energy to get up after round two.” 

“Or three, or four….” Seifer watched the blush expand and slide down beneath the hidden confines of the blanket. He watched the shiver of anticipation run through Squall and he couldn’t help reacting in kind. Not to mention pushing it further. “Maybe this time you’ll let me make you come just by touching you… Or I could make you beg again...”

“You are making an awful lot of cheques you’d better be able to cash.”

“You said yourself we have all day to ourselves. Several days, in fact, if I remember right.” 

“We do…,” Squall admitted. “I have a few meetings in the week but nothing until Tuesday.”

“So….” 

“So it’s a good thing none of my clothes would fit you so I can keep you here, isn’t it?”

Seifer grinned and trailed a hand along the inside of Squall’s thigh slowly under the blanket and rubbed one of the sensitive spots he’d found the previous night. It was enough to have Squall spreading his legs in encouragement to continue. “Very good.”

“Can I ask you some stuff? The asshole switch might be back on, just to warn you.”

Squall leant up on an elbow and nodded. They had indeed returned to bed and spent a little more time catching up on sleep between the predicted rounds two, three and four. Seifer had particularly enjoyed round three - when Squall had suggested they shower and clean up. Squall had shaved Seifer’s beard and not slit his throat with the straight razor even though after some of the stuff Seifer had said and done would have entirely entitled him to doing it. Shaving himself in future was going to be as dull as dishwater in future in comparison to watching Squall work like that. Especially given the part afterwards when he’d pinned Squall to the wall and gone down on him. “Go ahead.”

“It’s… about my existential crisis last night. Might be some sorceress stuff in there too,” Seifer winced at the way Squall tensed up on him, and rubbed his back slowly and soothingly. There were no protests, though so he went ahead and asked. “How did you figure out that you were gay?”

“...Combination of things. You remember I used to wait ‘til after you’d left to shower after our early duels?”

He remembered seeing Squall in his leathers, waiting in the locker room for him to leave. “I thought you thought I’d whip you with a towel or something.” 

“You might have if you’d turned to see me a few shower heads away with an erection…”

“...wait, because of _me_?” 

“Look, just because you can come back after summer break a foot taller with a tan and shoulder muscles that could crack walnuts doesn’t mean the rest of us weren’t affected too,” Squall replied dryly. He at least seemed vaguely amused at the line of questioning. Seifer hoped he could keep that up.

“Oh hyne, _that_? That was…”

“The summer you met Rin, I know,” Squall shrugged nonchalantly. He never really seemed to _mind_ talking about her, and they did seem to be even vaguely friendly despite what had happened between them. “And there’s a boy next door mag too; there were a few times you made me help you confiscate them.” 

“Well, you were an honorary member of the disciplinary committee so I made you take the contraband. I didn’t know you’d look at them yourself.” 

Squall rested a hand on Seifer’s stomach, his thumb tracing lightly back and forth. The touch was so light, so innocent but it still made Seifer shiver with anticipation. “It goes back further too but yeah. I’ve known for a few years that I wasn’t ever going to be straight, but let’s be honest, I didn’t really expect to live past twenty five so I didn’t think it mattered a whole lot.”

Seifer brushed his fingers lightly over Squall’s cheek, giving him a very deliberate, hard look. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed how SeeD life expectancies have increased with you running the shop.”

“Amazing what someone who’s experienced it themselves running the ship will do, hm?”

“Not to mention someone talented,” Seifer said firmly. Cid had been in Garden to do one very specific thing and granted, he’d saved the world. However, he had never really been at risk himself and had been perfectly happy to reap the rewards. With Squall’s far more focused and intent mind behind the helm of Balamb Garden, the garden had improved both for the members and for their clients. It’d also been a hell of a lot better for the kids who had to learn there. “And not infected by sweatervests.”

“If I get that far,” Squall said seriously. “Kill me.”

“On my honour. What’s left of it,” Seifer kept stroking Squall’s smooth cheek and just watching him. The way he reacted at the littlest touches was just perfection itself. “I… really need to ask this but I’m kinda scared to know the answer.”

“Just get it over with. If I don’t want to answer, I will tell you.”

“Okay…,” Seifer took a steadying breath. “Ulti had me…. Um… _perform_ for her to help boost and stabilise her powers.”

“She made you have sex with her, you mean.”

“Yeah. So… I was wondering about….

“Yes, I had to do the same for Rin.”

“And… you were able?”

“It was part of her romantic narrative, Seifer,” Squall gave him a little shrug. But Seifer could sense a coolness to the words, a distance between Squall Leonhart and what he was saying. This was somewhere it wasn’t right. Somewhere that Squall didn’t want to go. “I had to do whatever she wanted me to do. In every gory detail.”

“Are you telling me that she forced you to have sex with her?” Seifer asked, his voice barely above a whisper, as though someone might hear at any moment. 

“She didn’t know… not that it makes it any easier,” Squall shrugged and turned his head to kiss Seifer’s palm. “Her magic made me do things that she wanted, even down to… functioning for that. It couldn’t change me but it could make me it’s puppet. Can I ask you something in return?”

“I guess, sure..”

“Did you _want_ to have sex with Ultimecia,”

Seifer’s blood ran cold. He hadn't thought about it. He hadn’t even questioned it until Squall asked. “I… don’t know. I mean, she was beautiful, and I guess any straightish guy would if they were handed it on a plate like that…”

“That kind of sounds like a _no_ , Seifer.”

“I… fuck, I don’t know anymore. I thought I did but…”

“Hey,” Squall said, dragging his attention back again. He’d moved closer, close enough that Seifer could see every little thread of silver and blue in those perfect stormcloud eyes. Shiva was junctioned and she was more than a little active behind Squall’s eyes, her silver magic gleamed there. “It’s okay. Whatever happened, it’s done with. She’s gone, and anyway, she’d have to go through me to get to you even if she did come back.”

“I wouldn’t make you handle that again.”

“Seifer, please,” Squall rolled his eyes. “I’d hand her head to you on a platter before she dropped her first spell. Your ass is mine now. I’m wearing your marks and you’re wearing mine,” Squall very deliberately poked at one of the love bites he’d left on Seifer’s chest, almost enough to make him wince again. 

“Seem to remember at least one of those marks being there before the war,” Seifer smirked and nodded to the scar between his lover’s beautiful blue-grey eyes. 

“Hey, I’m pretty sure I still had a concussion. Also a sorceress had just grabbed me too.”

“Okay, so I’m thinking we ban weird hats. They seem to go with the crazy like sweatervests and failing.”

Squall chuckled softly, lowering his head to kiss Seifer’s throat softly. “Okay, We’ll work on that tomorrow.”

“Mm… maybe the next day,” Seifer slid his hand down to squeeze Squall’s ass deliberately.

“Are we going to leave the suite at all before that meeting tuesday?”

“Yeah. We’ll need to eat sometime.”

Bonus outtake:

“I never imagined you’d be so… vocal. Since you’re really not elsewhere.”

“That’s something you do to me, so you get the blame,” Squall said with a little roll of his eyes. He was looking over a report, leant against his desk in his office and Seifer had tagged along to see what was so important that it required Squall to leave the bedroom for several hours. He definitely needed to get him that damn turtleneck though, from the way Xu had eyed the mark on Squall’s throat.

“So… you haven’t been _vocal_ with other people?”

“No, and be very careful what you ask next.”

Seifer eyed Squall curiously, wondering just how many partners he’d had and who they’d been - besides the one he knew about. “Just… wondering what else I could make you do, you do beg so sexily.”

“Figure it out,” Squall smirked at him over the top of the report, “and I might be willing to try it.”

“I love a challenge.”

**Author's Note:**

> And that's all I have finished of this world for the moment. Perhaps I shall try more.


End file.
